Oh hi, “best worst movie” ever made! I had the pleasure of watching a gem of a bad movie recently after a friend’s recommendation. Now I have always been a fan of bad movies and the absolute joy they can bring. This is partly because I am a huge fan of horror films and you have to wade through a lot of shit before you find some quality. But that shit definitely has a lot of entertainment value. While this is commonplace for horror films, you rarely ever see this in other genres, which is exactly what makes The Room so interesting; It is a drama. And a drama that takes itself very seriously as the tagline for the original trailer proclaims, “It is a film with the passion of a Tennessee Williams play.” This film is definitely full of passion. That passion comes from the dynamic Tommy Wiseau who is a unique mix between Sly Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Borat, and Jean-Claude Van Damme. He is also credited as the director, writer, producer, and star of the film. This is his Citizen Kane.
The Room features all things that make a movie bad- a horrendous screenplay, terrible acting from every actor/actress, out of sync audio, bad cinematography, and the use of a green screen for absolutely no reason. Those all combine together to create a beautifully horrible movie. The best part is that the whole movie is consistently terrible and there is never any lull in the horribleness. You can watch in sheer joy and utter amazement at how bad it is- wondering how a movie this bad could have ever been made. And maybe the craziest part of it all- the film cost $6 million to make (and market). Tommy Wiseau supposedly raised this money by importing leather jackets from Korea. Luckily for us the film went on to reach cult status at midnight screenings across the country and even internationally.
The film centers around Johnny and Lisa’s relationship. Johnny, who has a heart of gold, would do anything for his girl Lisa (Juliette Danielle) but Lisa is disinterested in the nice guy routine so she decides to look elsewhere. Unfortunately for Johnny, elsewhere is pretty close, as she cheats with his best friend Mark (Greg Sestero). “Johnny is my best friend!” Lisa, who is hornier than most men, doesn’t care about the ramifications of her cheating so eventually (and by eventually we mean slowly) Johnny discovers what’s been going on and his world crumbles. “You are tearing me apart Lisa!” Mix in various subplots that make absolutely no sense (i.e- a man child named Denny who is basically Johnny’s adopted son, a drug dealer named Chris R., a random couple having sex in Johnny’s apartment with the help of chocolate, some very weird football ‘tossing,’ tuxedo football, a random character bringing up the fact that they have cancer which is never mentioned again) and you got yourself one hell of a movie.
If you haven’t seen this film yet- see it right away. It is literally too good to miss. Either buy the DVD or better yet go to the midnight screening at the Village East (every last Friday of the month). Either way, go with a group of friends and have a few drinks both beforehand and during. I recommend PBR talls or airplane bottles of vodka mixed with monster energy drink. Or drink what they drink in the film- scotchka (a mix of scotch and vodka) it is sure to do the trick. Always remember: watching The Room is an experience and experiences are best had while drinking.
- Seymour Winterbush